Jasper Hale's Blog
by Flag118
Summary: Um, I don't own any Twilight stuff or anything like that :) Please read all the other diary's as I'm making all the Cullen's blogs! Here is the link to Stephanie Cullen's diary, she's a made-up Cullen and I invented her :) I don't own Twilight again or anything! /s/9280769/1/Stephanie-Cullen-s-Homework-Assignmen t
1. Chapter 1

Carlisle is making us write blog's for three day's about things that happen. I think this all started when Stephanie got that English homework to write a diary. No one blames her. Well, almost no one, since Edward and Steph have never seen eye-to-eye before. They're always arguing. Sometimes it's quite funny to watch, but sometimes it gets boring and you just want them to be quiet.  
Emmett was laughing at me and Edward having to write diaries and he was calling us gay, until Carlisle told him that he had to write one as well. That shut him up.

It all started when Stephanie was watching the Nature Channel, and Edward came in. "Oh! I wonder what Steph's watching?" He said sarcastically. "The Nature Channel. The snake is about to eat the mouse." Steph said. Edward said "good" and she got very angry and threw a cushion at him. He dodged it and it hit Rosalie as she was coming down the stairs. Then Steph calmed down all of a sudden and didn't say anything until the show ended.

Steph was shifty all morning, and she was hyped up about something. She obviously wasn't thinking about anything in particular, or she didn't want Edward to know something, because he couldn't see anything in her mind. And Alice couldn't see what see was going to do. I thought she was planning to go out and get another snail or some other thing from the forest. Then, she just walked out of the front door without a word when Rosalie was in the middle of talking to her. That was a sign that she was planning something. Twenty minutes later, we heard the front door open, which meant she was home again. It was quiet for two whole minuets except for the TV in the living room.

I was curious about what she was up to, so I walked through the door of the living room and saw Stephanie on the ledge on top of the door. Then, this bag fell down off the door.  
I hit the bag away from me super-fast because vampire's have lightening reactions. It flew through the air and hit Edward in the back of the head, and the bag exploded all over him and the sofa. Edward turned round slowly and glared at Steph. He was furious. Stephanie was a mix between absolutely terrified and amused, and she giggled. I knew this was a mistake even without the ability to manipulate and sense emotions. I dashed out of the room in less than a second and into mine and Alice's bedroom, to see if she could help. Of course, I could have of just calmed them down, but Edward probably would have yelled at me later. I explained everything to Alice. We could hear Edward chasing Stephanie around the house being very loud. Edward is the fastest, but Stephanie had the slight advantage in this situation, being extremely agile and a little faster than an average vampire. "Ah. I see what you mean." Alice murmured. We came out of our room to watch. Edward chased Stephanie up the stairs. Suddenly we couldn't here anymore footsteps, but Edward was still shouting. Then Emmett went up the stairs and lent lazily against the banister, chanting "CAT FIGHT! CAT FIGHT!" Alice and I went up the stairs too, and Edward started screaming at Alice, so, naturally, I yelled at Edward for yelling at Alice. Everyone was shouting. Then, Rosalie came up the stairs to see what was going on. One of us shouted at Emmett for being annoying, and Rosalie screamed at whoever shouted at him. This all lasted about ten minutes, and I was surprised Carlisle had let us argue for that long. It was only when he came up and told everyone to go to their rooms, that I noticed that Stephanie was gone. She was probably in her room or in the forest.

She hasn't come back, yet and it's been three hours. Wow, she's sulking for a long time.  
Jasper.


	2. Chapter 2

Stephanie came back eventually. No one was really mad at her, they were all smiling really, but we weren't thinking about not-being-angry too much. This made Edward even angrier. Esme made Steph and Edward clear up the flour on the floor which was all over the house from where they had been running around. Edward and Stephanie started arguing _again_ until Esme stepped in and snapped at them both. Edward decided not to talk to Steph which happens all the time anyway. Emmett was laughing for basically the whole evening and was still laughing then until Edward yelled at him, but even then he only laughed quieter. Edward was even more annoyed then he was before.

I saw Stephanie sneaking into Edward's bedroom and picking up his wallet. Was she stealing money? I decided to not interfere. I didn't see her for another half hour, but she was by the lake the whole time. Then, she disappeared to her room for at least two hours. In the meantime, Alice dragged me, Rosalie and Emmett downstairs to play on the Xbox. Alice and Rosalie only quit playing because me and Emmett were thrashing them, five games to three. Oh yeah! Of course, I beat Emmett in the end, I always do. He went up to his and Rosalie's room to sulk, or, er, something like that. I went up to mine and Alice's room to... Um... Do the same.

Around half an hour later, Alice called Stephanie in to tell her all about fashion and dress her. I went and wasted time down stairs by seeing how quickly I could kill my character on the Xbox game, since no one had bothered to turn it off and both controllers were still on. My fastest time was 4 seconds when I threw a grenade at my character since the grenade takes _ages_ to explode.

When Alice was finished, I went back up to her room. After about five minutes, Steph begun screaming really loudly and for ages. We left it for about ten seconds and then went to see what was up since she was still screaming. Edward came in to, and I had the feeling it had something to do with him since he was laughing. Me and Alice were really confused. Then, Steph hissed at Edward while Alice walked over to her CD player and screeched "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!?" "Percy!" Stephanie wailed. I asked "what's 'Percy'?" And she said "my fish!" I said "I didn't know you had a fish..." Then Alice said in a matter-of-fact voice "she caught one today. Edward jammed it in her CD player."

Stephanie ran after Edward screaming at him while Edward was still laughing. Then she got a baseball bat and begun hitting him with it. Then Emmett came and begun hitting Edward with a bat as well. Luckily, Edward didn't get hurt. Although, when Steph and Emmett had finished with them, the bats had huge dents in them. Carlisle and Esme called Edward and Stephanie to talk with them. Naturally, everyone crowded round the door outside to listen. Though we didn't really need to, since vampire hearing is so good anyway we could have been upstairs and we still would have heard them, even if they were to whisper. When the lecture was over (or when Carlisle kicked them out of the living room), they carried on arguing until Rosalie screamed at them. Now they are obviously not talking to each other.

It's not fun being in the same room as them. It's too tense. I'm going to go out to the forest to hunt.  
Jasper.


	3. Chapter 3

It seems like almost everything in this house is breaking. Edward goes into Steph's room and breaks her things when she annoys him, she sometimes breaks his things by accident, etc, etc. Now the TV in living room's broken. Emmett is going crazy.

What happened first today is Edward and Stephanie aren't talking to each other. Again. Steph spelt her name wrong and Emmett laughed at her. Carlisle wanted to tutor her and said she needed to 'improve'. She asked "improve on what?" And Carlisle replied with "a few things" then Edward said nastily "basically, that's short for 'you need to improve on everything!'". She asked what he meant by 'everything' and Edward angrily replied with "what do you think!?" And Steph said "I don't know, do I?! I was the one asking the question!" And he has been ignoring her ever since.  
We all went hunting after that. That was probably why Steph and Edward were arguing. She gets all cranky when she's thirsty, whereas Edward is always cranky when Steph's around. While we were hunting, a mountain lion came and mauled Stephanie's favourite tee-shirt. She ate the animal afterwards, for revenge. Steph asked Alice if she could fix it for her but instead, Alice took her shopping. Alice tried to take me as well but I thought of an excuse. I always skive shopping.

While they were at the mall, I played Emmett and Edward at the Xbox game again. I won. Emmett's character died first, by an assassin with a shot-gun. Edward's character got killed by a grenade, thrown by me, as punishment for all the times he yells at Stephanie and makes her sad. I tried not to think about why though. He knows that I always target him, so he always targets me. Though I win every time. Emmett demanded a rematch, and targeted Edward this time. To my surprise, Emmett won. Edward stormed off in a strop. Then me and Emmett teamed up and ran around killing innocent villagers. Then we stole a horse and ran over loads of people. We scaled building and, timing our jumps perfectly, we landed on the villagers, squashing them flat. Who says violence can't be fun? I play the game with Stephanie once, and she didn't know which buttons did what, so she ended up kicking a fellow assassins horse, which angered him so he tried to attack her with a knife. She started pressing loads of random buttons and ended up shooting him twenty five times in the leg, while also killing some of the innocent villagers and the horse in question in the process. Then she accidentally blew up a house by firing twelve grenades at it. Then she rode a horse off an edge of a cliff. The impact of the rocks below killed both the character and the horse. All she could say was "that was the most horrendous game I've ever played." I don't understand her sometimes. She did really well, she murdered twenty three people and one horse (to her dismay, since she is animal obsessed) in the space of five minuets. I told her this, and she gave me a short lecture on how killing is wrong.  
I reminded her that it was just a video game, and she said that it was still a bad example to little children. I pointed out that it had an age rating of fifteen, and only a neglectful parent would let a child that young play this. She stared at me blankly for a few seconds, until I explained what 'neglectful' means. She said that it didn't matter what age rating it was, and that maybe the parents didn't see it. Then she pointed out that maybe a little kid could watch an older sibling playing it. I said that a mere video game wouldn't influence what the child wants to do when he or she grows up. She just said that I didn't know that for certain. I pointed out that she wasn't even fifteen, so she shouldn't be playing. She said that she was actually ninety eight, and that even if she was only eleven, it would've been my fault since I told her to play. Then we got into a big discussion about if the age ratings only applied to physical appearance or if even a person, like Stephanie, just _looked_ younger, but she was actually well over the age required. It was a long day.

Alice and Stephanie were four hours shopping in the mall and came back with fifteen bags full of clothes, shoes and accessories. Stephanie was bored out of her mind already, but then Alice made her put all the clothes away in her closet as well.

I was bored as well, so I decided to read a book to pass the never-ending time I had on my hands. Then Stephanie called for Carlisle from the living room, saying that the TV as broken. Carlisle asked "how?" And Stephanie explained "I don't know, it glitched!" Then Carlisle bent down and fiddled with the wires and then took the vent off. Flour floated down from the lid and onto the floor. Everyone looked at Steph as it was obviously her. Who else had had flour in the living room recently? Stephanie gasped over-dramatically and said "Who put flour in there?!" Then Emmett whined "Noooooooooo! There's a game on today! How am I supposed to watch it now!?" And Alice pointed out "Emmett, get over yourself. Your acting like this is the only TV in the house. There's basically one in every room!" Emmett said, still whining "but this is the best TV!" Stephanie sighed. "I'll buy a new one." She said sadly.

Steph just came into mine and Alice's bedroom and started bugging Alice into giving her back that six hundred dollars Alice borrowed from her. It's interesting watching Alice thinking if excuses. It's obvious to everyone except Steph that Alice used it all up on their shopping trip. She's going to flip when she find out.  
Jasper.


End file.
